Planning guide
Indian wedding events explained: haldi, mehndi, sangeet, baraat, pheras, vidaai and reception
An Indian wedding is usually a series of events over several days. The haldi and mehndi are close-family rituals before the wedding, the sangeet is a night of music and dance, the baraat brings the groom to the ceremony, the pheras are the vows, the vidaai is the bride’s farewell, and the reception is the party.
Why is an Indian wedding more than one day?
In many South Asian families the wedding is a gathering of both families, not only the couple, and each tradition marks a different part of that coming together. Which events you hold, what they are called and the order they happen in depend on your region, religion and family. A Punjabi, Gujarati, Tamil, Telugu, Bengali or Marathi wedding can look quite different, and many couples now combine or shorten events. Treat the list below as a guide to the common ones, then ask your families which matter most to them.
What is a haldi ceremony?
The haldi is a morning ritual, usually a day or two before the wedding or on the morning itself. Family and close friends apply a paste of turmeric (haldi), often mixed with ingredients such as gram flour, oil or rosewater, to the bride’s and groom’s face, arms and feet. It is meant as a blessing before married life. Traditionally the bride and groom each have their own haldi at home; some couples now hold it together.
Plan for: clothes you do not mind staining (yellow is traditional), an outdoor or easy-to-clean space, towels, and a photographer who is happy to get close. Some communities call related rituals pithi, ubtan, mayun or manjha.
What happens at a mehndi?
At the mehndi, a mehndi (henna) artist draws designs on the bride’s hands and feet, and often on guests’ hands too. The bride’s design is the most detailed and can take several hours, so it is usually done a day or two before the wedding to give the colour time to darken. Many families keep a tradition of hiding the groom’s name or initials in the design. The event is usually relaxed, with music, food and family.
Plan for: an experienced bridal mehndi artist, extra artists if many guests want mehndi, comfortable seating for the bride, and a timeline that allows the henna to dry. Our guide to choosing a mehndi artist lists the questions to ask, and our mehndi night ideas cover food, music and timing.
What is a sangeet?
The sangeet (meaning music) is an evening of song and dance, often the most energetic night of the wedding. Families and friends perform prepared dances, there may be speeches or a skit about the couple, and then everyone dances. In Gujarati families the evening may be a garba or raas with dandiya sticks. The sangeet is often combined with the mehndi.
Plan for: a DJ who knows Bollywood, bhangra and regional music, a stage or dance floor, a running order for performances, and good lighting for photos and film. See how to plan a sangeet for a running order.
What is a baraat?
The baraat is the groom’s arrival procession, usually just before the ceremony. The groom arrives on a decorated horse, in a car or on foot, surrounded by his family and friends dancing to a dhol or a DJ. At the venue the bride’s family welcomes the baraat; in many families the two sides greet each other formally (in Punjabi families this greeting is called the milni) and the bride’s mother welcomes the groom with an aarti.
Plan for: permission from your venue for the procession route, any horse or sound equipment, a dhol player or mobile sound system, timing so the ceremony can start on time, and a photographer at the front of the procession. The baraat checklist covers each item.
What are the pheras?
The pheras are the heart of a Hindu wedding ceremony. The couple walk around a sacred fire (agni) in the mandap while the priest recites mantras, with each round representing a vow or blessing. Many traditions take seven rounds or seven steps (the saptapadi); some take four. Around the pheras you may also see the jaimala or varmala (exchange of garlands), the kanyadaan (the bride’s parents giving her hand), the tying of the mangalsutra and the application of sindoor. Sikh, Muslim and other ceremonies have their own rituals; see our guide to Hindu, Sikh, Muslim and fusion ceremonies.
What is a vidaai?
The vidaai is the bride’s farewell from her family at the end of the wedding. It is often emotional. In many North Indian families the bride throws handfuls of rice or puffed rice back over her head towards her family as she leaves, as a wish that their home stays full. The couple then leave together, traditionally for the groom’s family home. Among Muslim families the farewell is often called the rukhsati.
Plan for: a set time in the schedule, a decorated car, and close family at the front so the photographer can see their faces.
What happens at the reception?
The reception is the celebration after the wedding, usually that evening or on a following day. It is often the largest event, with dinner, speeches, a first dance and an open dance floor, and it is the one many friends and colleagues attend. In Muslim families the walima, hosted after the nikah, plays a similar role. Couples often change into a different outfit for the reception.
Which other events might our families hold?
- Roka, sagai or engagement: the families formally agree to the match, often with a ring exchange.
- Chooda ceremony: in Punjabi families, the bride’s maternal uncle gives her a set of red and white bangles on the wedding morning, and kaleere are tied to them.
- Ganesh puja or pooja: a prayer before the wedding events begin, asking for them to go smoothly.
- Grah pravesh: the bride’s welcome into her new home after the wedding.
How do we plan the events together?
List the events your families want, then decide which can be combined (for example mehndi and sangeet on one evening) and which need their own venue. Note the guest list for each, since a haldi may be thirty people and a reception several hundred. Then book vendors who can cover the full schedule. The free events planner on Desi Shaadi & Co. keeps each event’s date, venue and guest list in one place, and the 12-month desi wedding checklist shows when to book what.
Frequently asked questions
What is the order of events in an Indian wedding?
How many days does an Indian wedding last?
What is the difference between mehndi and sangeet?
Do guests attend the haldi?
What should guests wear to each event?
Keep planning
Find the vendors for each event with the desi wedding vendor checklist, see how other couples did it in real weddings, or browse all our planning guides.